Pizza and Wine

This song reminds me of sittiing in a pub, five years ago today on the day I met the wife for the first time. (Although a quantity of wine was consumed neither of us ate pizza that day).


Can you shut your eyes and turn away from me
I'm gonna say some things I've never said before
And I'm feeling kind of stupid and I'm feeling kind of shy
But they're building up inside of me and I have to let you hear them
Cos you never know, the world might end and one of us might die,
Don't be laughing, but I love the way you smile.

Could you maybe close your ears and talk to someone else
While I tell you things I've never said before,
Cos I'm feeling kind of stupid and I'm feeling kind of shy.
That I've not been used to tenderness and I've not been used to being kissed
Or being held for hours at a time, eating pizza and drinking wine.
Oh I love the way you put your hand in mine.

Could you ever reach behind you and turn the music up,
While I say some things I've never said before,
But it's getting easier to tell you more and more.
That I always dreamed of waking up to singing in my ear,
in fact I used to dream of....
Now you don't even sing in tune, but that's alright with me
Cos I have always loved the way you sing to me.
Now I've always been the scary type,
And I've always felt the need to fight,
My words will pierce the skin and make you bleed.
But you light my fires when I get cold,
You buy me back when I get sold
And you've never been afraid to love me,
And I will always love the way you love me,
I will always love the way you love me.

Juliet Turner - From Lets Hear it for Pizza

Not Just for Lorries

I'm heading off shortly to visit my mum for the weekend so if everyone else who is using the A1(M) and M1 this afternoon please remember that we drive on the LEFT in this country and that any other lanes are for overtaking. Once you have completed your manoeuver (i.e. passed the vehicles going more slowly than you) if you move back into the left hand lane we will all have a nice afternoon as well as getting to our destinations faster and more easily. Now let's all have a pleasant journey.

More tales of moving

We passed the house we nearly bought today and the people who (thankfully) pipped us to it were moving in. We're still hoping to be moving in the first week in may but the mortgage advisor we've been seeing thought it best to delay the re-mortgage on the wifes house until things moved on a bit with the new mortgage. The trouble is he seems to have forgotten about it and we are now facing a delay while he sorts out the paperwork which could have been done weeks ago. His theory was that we didn't want to be paying the buy-to-let mortgage before we actually moved but there are surely later stages that we could have held it up if necessary. Listening to the wife talking to him on the phone though is entertaining - he must be the only person who can talk more than the wife can!

We drove past the new house today (as I do everyday, just to make sure it's still standing)! The garden is blooming, it looks like the old lady took really good care of it and all sorts of colourful flowers are flowering already, and it's still only April. The garden is one of the main reasons we are buying this house and will be a priority once we move in. There is a gravel area just right for a veggie plot and a perfect spot for a greenhouse. It will take some preparing but I can't wait to start growing food. My only problem is that it's getting late in the planting season and will be several weeks before the veggie plot is ready. I'm tempted to start planting seeds in the propagator now but am worried that they die before we are able to transplant them (if they start growing at all, I'm not very green fingered, yet).

Don't come too close

I'm back in the spare room again having been struck down by bird flu a virus which quite sensibly the wife doesn't want to catch (although she is looking after me well, supplying endless cups of tea, just not coming any nearer than an arms length away). Have to drag myself back into the land of the living soon - so much to do, so much to blog about - just so little energy to do so.

Gee Up

What better way to spend a wet, cold Saturday afternoon than with a windswept Clare Balding (when Sue Barker isn't taking over) and the racing on the telly, and of course a flutter on the Grand National. My money is on Innox and an each way on Amberleigh House. Amberleigh House may be getting on a bit but he should have no problem getting round. Now to work out how many will fall at the first fence.


UPDATE: Ok, so Innox fell at the first fence and the other was pulled up on the second curcuit. At least the wifes horse finished, just not fast enough to cover our loses!

Shock Horror!

So a swan has been found to have died with bird flu in Scotland. The end of the world is nigh! I was late for work this morning because breakfast news said they had a reporter inside the 'protection zone' at Cellardyke and I wanted to see the mass panic and people dying in the streets. Alas, it looked just like a sleepy seaside town. Then they went to a supermarket in South London where people insisted that they only buy free range organic chicken anyway so there was no risk to their health which cheered me up. Free range organic poultry is probably more at risk because they are kept out in the lovely fresh air where wild birds can come and go as they please, passing on their germs. Having said that how many cases are there of transmission from bird to human through eating chicken? How many cases of human to human transmission have there been? I'll shut up before this story really starts to wind me up.

Staying on a similar subject, the local news last night ran a story about a giant rabbit eating its way through vegetable plots and allotments, and this isn't the first giant rabbit to have made the news recently. Perhaps we should be less worried about bird flu and more worried about starvation giant rabbits take over the country and destroy all crops.

Another girl

I have been banished to the spare room for the last few nights, through no fault of my own. The oldest grandkid has been staying with us as her mum hasn't been well and being the awkward 5 yr old that she has refused to sleep anywhere but with her Nan. Thankfully her mother has made a full recovery and the pair have returned to their own home and their own beds. As much as love the kid the spare bed is small and cold and I can't wait to snuggle up with the wife again. Clean sheets, clean pj's, clean me - roll on bed time!

Baldwins

I can't believe that they are killing Mike Baldwin off so quickly. It's only a few weeks since he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. When it comes to issues like this the script writers should portray it more realistically. Apparently they did the same with Alma, killing her too quickly as well.

(Talking of Alma, it might just be my thing for older women but does any one else think that Amanda Barrie is rather nice? Apart from in the awful wig they had her in in Bad Girls).

Anyway, yes. The point of this post was a could have done better to the Corrie writers!

Girls and Boys

5 yr old GK was staying with us this weekend. Last night she asked for water.

5 yr old: I like water but boys like juice. It’s a boy thing. Boys like juice. Girls like water and juice.
Me: So boys don’t like water?
5 yr old: Do you know the other difference between girls and boys?
Me: No
5 yr old: Girls have a tuppence and boys have a boobie-tuppence.
Me & Wife: What?
5 yr old: Girls have boobies up here and a tuppence down here (pointing) but boys have a boobie-tuppence down here.

God knows who’s been trying to teach her the finer details of anatomy but strangely enough I can see her logic!

Food glorious food

Every so often I forget that no matter how long past lunch time it has got
without eating, no matter how hungry I am, food from the hospital snack shop
will never taste good. Ever. Food is one of lifes pleasures and I always
feel cheated when it's no good. Minted lamb and chargrilled parsnips on
malted bread sounded good at the time but is a mistake I will never make
again. And I could have got half a starter at my favorite restaurant for the
same price.

Nice try

The wife doesn't like to follow the rules and certainly can't be told what
she should be doing. In fact she tends to do the complete opposite. I
pointed out to her last night that the earlier she has to get up in the
morning, the later she goes to bed. I then told her that she really
shouldn't be having sex with me and that a good many people probably think
the same way. It didn't work, she was too tired from the late night and
early morning! You can't blame a girl for trying though.

Time Goes By

What happened to the last few days? It's Wednesday again already. I blame it on the clocks going forward and that lost hour. It's nice not to be woken so early by the sun streaming through the curtains and even nicer to be driving home in the daylight. Last night was chaos on the roads due to the
Big Strike and then some idiot causing an 'incident' on another major route. I sat in my car going nowhere fast but actually quite enjoyed it. The sun was shining and there was some good music on the radio - it was nice to HAVE to sit there and do nothing.

As for the strike itself, I don't see why council workers shouldn't have to work until they're 65. As life expectancy increases so should the retirement age be raised. I was actually quite shocked to hear that 26% of the council tax we pay is used to pay the pensions of former council employees. With all the fuss about rocketing council tax they should wait until 65 to get the full pension!

Packing

I'm practising for moving house by moving labs at work. I like my old lab
but it is being knocked down and rebuilt again. I don't see why they need
to, the place looks like it's well used and god knows what they will find
when they start shifting the dust. My new lab is like a goldfish bowl but it
does have views over the rooftops to the fields beyond. I'm not sure about
my new collegues though - a half million pound piece of equipment and
someone has stolen the extension lead from the computer that goes with it.
Probably the same person who last week was downloading music on it! Hello!
Very expensive equipment for illegal downloading? Excuse me while I go and
polish my machine to get those grubby fingerprints off.

Headaches

Ask any researcher and they are likely to say that funding issues are one of their biggest headaches. We have just found out that one of our applications has been turned down - two of the reviewers liked our work and said the grant should be given but the third claimed that the technology doesn't work and we won't get results. We are already getting results and showed some of the preliminary data in the application. It makes me question his motives. He's probably one of these old guys who doesn't trust the new techniques. There is a nice permanant job advertised just up the road which sounds appealing. If something similar comes up in two years time I might be tempted to sell my soul to the devil and make the jump into industry. Then again, I probably won't. I enjoy the freedom I have to do my own thing.

It's Back!

The womens curling world championships are taking place in Canada at the
moment (the men get their chance next month I believe)! Oh joy at spending
the next few late nights infront of Eurosport. As I said during the
Olympics, it really is a sport best enjoyed late with a few beers, so yay to
time differences!

We're in the money

When I started this job a few months back I was disappointed to find that
the pay was less than I was expecting. Until this week, when I find that the
powers that be that spend their lives jiggling things like payscales around
have given me a payrise. So I am very NOT disappointed to find that actually
I am on more than I was expecting in the first place. AND it is to be
backdated to my start date. Yay! I've been wanting to take the wife to a
lovely restaurant that she has never been to, (where the mussels are
fantastic) but with saving for the house move she hasn't let me. This seems
like the perfect excuse to get out and celebrate! Double Yay!

Rug Rats

My life seems to have been taken over by small children. From being sprayed
with baby sick by the youngest to being left alone with full responsibility
for a 2 yr old and a 3 yr old, both overly-hyper and hell bent on wrecking
the place. Biscuits and childrens TV helped to keep them in the same room
(damage limitation) and they eventually tired themselves out so that when
the wife returned it was calm and peaceful. "Aren't they little angels" were
her exact words, I'll not repeat mine! She's a typical doting granny - none
of the kids can do much wrong in here eyes and I know I've said it before
but they are one of the advantages of being with an older woman. She's also
adamant that I have to have my own kid(s) one day. She's old enough to be my
own mother but I can't think of any one I'd rather have to be the 'other
mother' to my/our kids. That's not to say that we have any immediate plans
for reproducing, I'll keep practicing on other peoples offspring for a while
yet!

Travel plans

I've had enough of work for one week. I have acheived next to nothing because someone somewhere, and I don't know who or how, has messed up and I can't do anything in the lab until it's sorted. I really want to start getting some results because there is a conference in California at the end of the year that sounds quite nice (both the subject of the conference and the location). On the subject of conferences, one of the major ones in my particular field is held every two years which meant that a couple of years ago I was sent on a jolly across the Pond to the 'City of Brotherly Love'. This year it's being held in Spain which means that in another two years it will be back on the other side of the Atlantic again. It's not that I have anything against Europe but when I'm not paying for the trip it's nice to get as far as possible. So if I get my preliminary results ready for California I then have another 2 years to get a full set of results to take to the big gig. Now there's just the small matter of finding funding for these plans. Oh and getting the results. Well a girl's gotta have some dreams!


UPDATE: After pondering this post (it's been a slow afternoon) I have decided that actually I'm not much fussed about going to conferences for the following reasons;

1. they're not really about 'seeing the world' but about working
2. I don't really like 'networking' and can never remember peoples names (especially important people)
3. I make page after page of notes on all the interesting talks but then can never read my handwriting making me sitting in a darkened room for hours on end scribbling away a pointless exercise
4. It gets lonely, especially having a big bed all to yourself
5. I have to leave the wife at home (see 4.)
6. I don't have enough hands for carrying a suitcase, a laptop, a poster, a bag with all the junk I need for a flight and all the junk collected from the conference in (and that's me travelling light)
7. I don't do jet-lag very well - I need a week to recover
8. I don't like very hot/very cold weather (I always end up with one extreme)
9. I never get a window seat when I ask for one
10. US Immigration people scare me (the Dutch however I found to be overly friendly)
11. I like my home comforts (see 5).

I'll just read the abstracts when they're published instead.

Random

Okay, so contrary to its title, the last post had nothing to do with the
Ides of March. The 15th of March merely reminds me of studying Julius Caesar
in GCSE English many moons ago and I sometimes struggle to come up with
catchy titles that are going to grab the attention of anyone stopping by.
That was the first thing that came into my head, it was early!

Still on the subject of the last post, no need for curling in the
commonwealth games, they have bowls! (of the crown green type, typically
played by older people in the park on sunny afternoons - although I did get
into playing it myself one summer and do occasionally suggest to the wife
that we take it up. We could do with taking up a sport to get fit and it
seems like nice, gentle exercise). It's a relief, I thought I was going to
have to turn to synchronised swimming to provide my entertainment.

Changing the subject, the surveyors report has come back on the new house
and I'm pleased to say it's not falling down although the roof may need
replacing at some point in the future. We paid nearly 500 quid to have a
bloke tell us the roof may need replacing in the future! Now I'm no
structural engineer but don't most roofs need replacing eventually? Now we
need to delay the survey on the wifes house as the ceiling we had
re-plastered last summer looks like it's about to fall down - we have learnt
our lesson that re-plastering may make the rooms look pretty but it ain't
worth the mess. There is something to be said for the much maligned
anaglypta!

Beware the Ides of March

Apparently this week is National Science Week. But, rather than waffle on about my work (which is actually just a long list of acronyms that I can never remember what they actually stand for) I shall just refer you to New Scientist and the potential for remote controlled sex toys described in my last post. Who knew science could be such fun!

Rather than doing my own science I want to stop at home and watch the opening ceremony of the Commonwealth Games. I've only just recovered from the excitement of the winter Olympics, now this. Where do I go to lobby to get curling into the Commonwealth games?

Long distance lovers

The article here describes wi-fi wine glasses which let people in long distance relationships (or any other sociable pairs I guess) share a drink. The glasses glow when one of the pair raises the glass and puts it to their lips, no matter how far apart they are. Now I'm no physicist but if you can make LEDs glow using wi-fi what else can be turned on using similar technology? Surely it's only a matter of time before two people can have all the fun of an intimate relationship without ever having to be in the same room! Vibrating mobile phones have been around for a while, how difficult would it be to adapt that technology and make them more controllable using wi-fi? The mind boggles as to how far this could be taken.

D'oh

Lack of posts = busy few days. Things are taking off at work and I seem to
have spent most of this week in meetings. For the first time I'm really
starting to feel that I know what I'm talking about and am not afraid to put
my hand up and have my say. The one think I'm not getting any better at is
remembering names. The other day I found myself 'networking' (hate that
word) and talking to a guy who was very interesting and seemed interested in
my project (perhaps he was just being polite). Anyway, one thing lead to
another as they do in these situations and he might be interested in
collaborating in the future. It was only the following day that I worked out
that actually he is one of the people who first described the whole field
I've been working on for the last four years and a couple of his papers I
cite just about every time I talk about my work! Do you ever have one of
those moments when you just want to kick yourself for being a bit slow on
the uptake?

Gardens

The house buying is proceeding nicely. We have signed our lives away (just
how many direct debit forms do the building society need) and are waiting
for the survey on both the new house and the valuers report on the wifes
house for the re-mortgage. We are keen to move asap as we need to get the
veggie plot prepared and seeds sown before it's too late. Forget the DIY
books and colour charts, the wife is investing in gardening books and keeps
talking about crop rotation. I'm just sorry there isn't enough garden for
one of those sit-on lawn mowers and I don't think one tree justifies buying
a chain saw. I will however a nice collection of power tools for the work
that does need doing. And a garden shed to keep them in!

School run

I took the 5 yr old to school this morning. We were of course late and she
has no sense of urgency. After jumping out of the car and then having to go
back for her school bag behind we made it into the playground where she
wanted to run around for a while before I managed to get her through the
front door and into the cloakroom. Other kids were in and out in a flash but
not us, she doesn't see the need to rush. Eventually she heads off towards
the classroom before running back for hugs. When she does make it into class
I notice all the classes are dancing and doing exercises with the very prim
and proper teacher leading them. So cute. What a fab way to start the day, I
might have to try it myself. All together now... in out, in out, shake it
all about!

Hairy

I really dislike going to the hairdressers, I don't know why but I do. Consequently I let my hair grow until I get sick of it then get it all chopped off (although apparently once my hair starts to get long I look about 14 - remind me of that when I'm old and not wanting to look my age, but at 27 and a half it's not so good). Today I finally got around to getting a hair cut - I can tell because my neck is now in a draught. The other problem I have is that I can never remember the name of the person that cut my hair so I end up with someone different every time I go and they always seem to worry about cutting so much hair off. Today she wanted to know that I wouldn't burst into tears as she snipped! The wife seems to like the new me so it was worth the stress and small fortune.

This may be a bit random

Despite there having been warnings of snow and chaos for the last couple of
days the sun hasn't stopped shining and I've not seen a single snowflake
(although apparently I wasn't watching closely enough yesterday, but then my
office doesn't have any windows). It has been a bit cold though, not helped
by the fact that the heating at work has broken down and no one seems to
want to fix it (we are being demolished in a couple of months so they
probably think that it's not really worth fixing the heating). 13 deg C was
recorded at lunch time in one of the labs, no wonder my fingers are so numb
I can't feel the keyboard. Talking of ice, I nearly had a rather large chunk
through my windscreen this morning whilst hurtling along the motorway. A
lorry seemed to be shedding shed loads of ice off it's roof. My life flashed
before my eyes! Talking of cars (see this may not be so random after all),
what is it with blacked-out windows? So that you can pick your nose in
private?

There, I feel better having waffled for a while. There is no one to talk to
here.

I grew up in the middle of the country and only ever saw the sea twice a year on holidays. After nearly five years living just a couple of miles from the beach and seeing the sea in the distance everyday on my drive home from work there is still something awesome about it. I can sit and stare out to sea for hours and just let my mind wander where it wants to. Yesterday on the way home we stopped at one of the bars on the seafront for a drink and sat in the window watching the waves break over the pier. I suddenly felt surprised at my life as it is now. I can't remember what I expected life would be like at this point but I'm pretty sure it wasn't going to be like this. I almost stopped and changed thoughts, scared that if I thought about my life in any detail I wouldn't like it. But then I realised that put simply I am actually approaching 30 with a successful career, buying a house with the woman I love and living the life that I have made for myself. The scary details are the bits that other people worry about - that I'm buying a house with someone else yet there is no guarantee of a job here in two years time; that the person I love is a woman; that the woman I love is old enough to be my mother.

But I'm happier than ever, and these worries are not my worries.

Shopping

I hope to God that this house buy doesn't fall through as we have spent all weekend browsing shop after shop looking at kitchens, bathrooms and bedroom furniture. After four hours in Ikea we think that we have decided on a kitchen and a new set of wine glasses.

Victory at last

We may not have got any medals in the curling or on the piste but oh how todays Calcutta Cup win for Scotland makes up for it.

Note to self

When sneakily watching the curling on the BBC website at work, don't leap
out of your chair and shout 'yessssss' when David Murdoch makes a double
takeout to take three points in the 7th end and make the score 6-5. Yes I
know USA are in the lead, just, but there's two ends left! It's just too
exciting!

Phew!

After a sleepless night spent chewing fingernails we heard first thing this
morning that the offer has been accepted! I thought the first offer being
quite low would be rejected so am doubly chuffed because we can now afford
to do everything we want to make it into our dream home. We can't quite
believe that after almost a year of talking about it, we are actually
proceeding with buying a house! Is it too early to be looking at kitchens
and bathroom suites?

Wahay!

House and Home

The saga of the house hunting may be about to come to an end. We have finally heard that we can get the mortgages we need and have decided on a house that we both absolutely love. It's the right size, right location and although it needs some work will be stunning when it's done. So, we have just put in an offer and are now waiting on the edges of our seats to see if it will be accepted. It's quite a bit below the asking price but considering all that needs doing we think it's fair. If we have to go any higher we will be stretching our budget to the max to get everything done the way we want it. Just a case of wait and see now, so fingers crossed!

Money honey

Barclays bank have today announced record profits and are being criticised for the amount they are making from charging customers. I would just like to stand up and say I think Barclays have got it about right. When I went briefly into the red recently they wrote and told me that they would waive the charges since I usually keep my account in good order and indeed the money they took from my account went straight back in. I'm fed up of people thinking that they can have something for nothing, spend money that ain't yours and you're gonna pay for it, that's life. (I know it's not always that simple, but this is a 'must have' society - what's wrong with waiting and saving to getwhat you want? It makes it much more exciting)!

Phew - this wan't supposed to turn into a rant but I feel better for getting it off my chest!

I was going to prattle on about other things but I've forgotten what now. So think yourselves lucky and thank you for your time.

I don't like mondays

I knew it was going to be a bad day when I just couldn't remember the key
pad number to get into the lab this morning (I have worked here for over
four years).

And I know funding is tight around here but it would be nice to have some
heating on - it is still winter after all. Brrrrr.

And I just know that with the rate at which I'm working today I'm not going
to get away in time to be home for the last womens curling match this
evening

And it seems that in the mornings I either have time to make lunch or make
breakfast. Today I did the former and ended up eating it by 10am. So now I'm
off to get an soggy sandwich filled with unrecognisable filling. And coffee.
Coffee will help!

Update at 11.11pm: So the GB women got knocked out despite a few exciting ends there tonight (you would have thought that with Rhona Martin shouting at them like that they might have played better throughout, she'd scare the crap out of me)! Then to top it all off I went and missed all but the last 5 minutes of ER!

Cor blimey - Roll on Tuesday!

Life's choices

Everywhere you look it seems that there are 'experts' telling us that we are all going to die young because we eat the wrong foods, drink too much, don't get enough exercise, have stressful lifestyles etc. Then this morning there was an article saying that we aren't having enough babies to look after us and fund us as we all live to a ripe old age.

Does this mean that people who don't have children to pay for them in old age should live an 'unhealthy' life while those who have lots of kids should do all that they can to ensure that they live until at least 100 to give their kids a purpose in life? Better still, if I don't have kids can I keep up my love affair with food and wine?

Ice Ice Baby

A quiet week blogging because I've been busy at work (watching the live streaming of the Olympics on the BBC website). The only problem I'm having is that the last couple of Winter Olympics have been in different time zones meaning that we had to watch most of it late at night. Not only do I have to miss most of the events this time round as I'm at work, but some of the stranger events aren't quite so fascinating to watch over breakfast as they are after a few beers.

I wouldn't mind having a go at the luge (but not the skeleton - the head looks very vulnerable hurtling down the ice in front at great speed). And as for that snowboard cross, it's almost as exciting as the curling (but fancy celebrating winning before the finish line and the falling over - I'm sure that won't keep cropping up on 'what happened next')! I'd better go and make sure the beers are chilling as it's GB vs Norway in the curling in half an hour!

VD

We didn't bother with valentines day, decided it was a load of commercial claptrap (or as the wife put it so much more eloquently, it's pandering to a capitalist society)! My excuse is that romantic gestures are for all year round so why should Feb 14th be special (although if a dozen red roses, a large box of chocolates and a cuddly toy had come my way this might have been an altogether different post). Having said all that we did enjoy a nice meal, a bottle of fizzy wine (left over from the PhD celebrations, not bought specially for the occasion) and curled up on the sofa in front of the telly.

Talking of last nights telly, I was getting prepared to rant all about last nights edition of 'Holiday Showdown' and the bloke that thought that homosexuality was the root of all evil but also thought it perfectly acceptable to take his kids on a shooting holiday, shooting pigs and firing the biggest gun in the whole of Texas. Fortunately after he got to know the bisexual couple who took him and his family to San Francisco his opinion seemed to change somewhat. So he has been given a reprieve. Or perhaps I'm just in a good mood.

Every cloud has a silver lining

I have spent most of the day at work preparing for a meeting this afternoon
with lots of pretty diagrams ready to pass on information from my trip last
week. Then 10 minutes before the meeting I find out that actually the person
I was supposed to be seeing isn't in today. And my work computer has gone
bang on me and so I'm relegated to a steam powered machine. At least it's in
a quiet corner and I have figured how to get the sound working so I am
happily ensconced in the curling - GB lead Denmark 2-1 after 6 ends!
(although some of the sounds coming through the earphones are bizzare when
not looking at the pictures)!

Bricks and mortar

So as the Olympic opening ceremony continues in the background we're left thinking about our housing situation. The idea now is that we keep this one, remortgage to rent it out to raise the money to buy our little palace. Renting out the wifes house will pay for itself and be a nice investment for the future and we can still afford to move to a bigger place in a nicer area with a garden. When it comes to buying we have managed to narrow the choices down to two, doth need work but one is slightly bigger than the other. The smaller one is owned by an old lade, it's very old fashioned and needs a whole new kitchen and bathroom and general updating but it's clean and well looked after. The other one has loads of space but is really tatty and dirty. The kitchen and bathroom are modern but are falling apart and we would rearrange the walls upstairs to make better use of the space. While my heart says one and my head says the other I'm trying to picture them both finished. I thought last summer finding a house would be easy but in reality it is a lot harder, or perhaps I'm just being picky!

The few days away was opportunity for both of us to think about the best way forward and having talked about it today it looks like we have both come up with the same idea.

Back

It's nice to be home after an eventful few days elsewhere in Europe. The work was intensive, early starts and late nights interspersed with 'networking' (I hate that word and dislike doing it even more) so was happy to be heading home. What didn't help was missing the connecting flight and spending a sleepless night on an uncomfortable bench in the airport. Especially after the flights stopped and there was no more plane spotting or people watching to do. I had to be up at seven yesterday morning and managed about half an hours sleep this afternoon - 36 hours without sleep for someone who is used to at nine hours a night isn't pretty!

It was a nice feeling to finally step off the plane at our local airport and really felt like I was home. Even nicer less than an hour later to be sitting at home with the wife and a decent cup of tea.

Off

I'm off on a trip, business rather than pleasure unfortunately so things will be quiet here for a couple of days. Why whenever I say I'm traveling light do I always end up with a bag that weighs a ton?

Oh flower of Scotland...

...when will we see
your like again!

Everyone I have spoken to has laughed at my 'joke' about Scotland doing the Grand Slam and winning the Six Nations*. Who'd have thunk that we could beat France (who incidently were described at one point today as being second best in the world behind the All Blacks) and be in the top half of the table with last years champions bottom! No wooden spoon for us this year. Okay, I know there are still four games left but with the new coach Scotland have turned themselves around (and next year is world cup year). To beat the favourites for the Grand Slam today after winning just one 6 Nations game in two years, tis a pleasure to be (semi-)Scottish.


In other news: I'm feeling broody having spent time with Tiny Step-Grandkid this weekend. Although they don't do much in the first few weeks of life, there is something special about having a baby fall sound asleep in your arms. (And I need someone to educate about the wonders of Scottish rugby).

*Rugby union tournament played annually between Scotland, England, Wales, Ireland, France and Italy. Grand Slam = winning all five matches; wooden spoon = bottom of table team. See this for a fuller explanation of (one of) the most exciting tournaments around.

Fun and games

With the Six Nations starting this weekend and the Winter Olympics starting on Friday I'm feeling sporty. Being a fan of the underdog I'm backing Scotland to take the grand slam and top the 6 nations table and at least one skiing medal from Torino. And here's hoping Rhona Martin and the girls can curl their way to gold again this time round. Sweeeeep!

One way to see in the new year

I have just come across a discussion forum for a particular technique I'm
using at work and was surprised by the information bar at the bottom of the
page:

Most users ever online was 21 on Jan 1 2006, 02:01 AM

I know us scientists are supposed to be an anti-social bunch but even I'm
not that sad!

ERrrr

I'm not really into computer games, apart from Theme Hospital that is. And occationally flight sim. Oh and I recently discovered Lemmings online. But I don't tend to go out and buy computer games very often. Until this week when I discovered ER, the game, as in ER one of my most favorite telly programs. And complete with a review that said that as I love Theme Hospital I will love this too! I was hoping it would arrive yesterday while I was 'working from home' but alas it landed on the doormat this morning after I had left for work. So for the last two hours I have been trying to figure it out - I feel like a 15 year old boy with the latest computer game, I'll have to be careful or I could end up locking myself in my bedroom and playing all night! Fear not, the wife is not feeling neglected, she is playing games too!

We really should get out more!

Inbreeding

A child whose parents are both scientists are more likely to be autistic so says this article. Apparently, people such as scientists, engineers or mathematicians are 'systemizers' and the genes which are responsible for making such people analytical "may also impair their social and communication skills". A Cambridge prof suggests that systemizers "tend to be less interested in the social side of life, and can exhibit behaviour such as an obsession with detail - classic traits associated with autism" (I wondered why people keep telling me I have an obsessive personality and I'll take my computer and a quiet night in over a social function any day).

"Professor Baron-Cohen said the rise in autism might be linked to the fact that it had become easier for systemizers to meet each other, with the advent of international conferences, greater job opportunities and more women working in these fields".

Which conferences does he go to? A conference is the last place I would think of looking for a spouse (one of us in the family is quite enough thank you). Or perhaps I'm just happily settled with the wife, who fortunately is not a systemizer but is a rather good poet.

Disorganisation

One day I will learn to be more organised. My car tax expired yesterday, the MOT today and insurance tomorrow and of course the woman at the post office won't give me a new tax disk without having new certificates for the other two. The insurance is sorted but I'm hoping the garage around the corner can MOT my car today. I daren't drive to work though as I have multiple near misses on a daily basis and it's only a matter of time before I and someone/something else collide. Knowing me that time would be today and my insurance would be null and void. Next January would someone please kick me up the arse to get sorted sooner!

Update: The garage around the corner managed to fit us in and my little car passed with flying colours so I'm all legal again.


For illustrative purposes only - my Ka is rarely this shiny

Fame and fortune

First of all there was Pop Stars, Pop Idol, Fame academy and the X Factor - Now we have FameLab, the Pop Idol of the science world. Somehow I can't see it filling a prime time saturday evening slot, although some of the auditions will probably be even more cringe-worthy than some of the bad Pop Idol auditions! And no, I won't be entering - I have no desire to become the next Will Young in a white coat.

Work rant

The hours at work are quite flexible, hence I aim to be in around 9.30
(usually it's closer to 10 by the time I've found a parking space) and stay
usually until after 6 (unless I have mis-timed the lab work or things have
gone wrong, then it's later). This works for me as 9-5 would mean spending
twice as much time sitting in traffic - by the time I leave work the roads
are empty and I can fly home. For others here, the arrival time varies but
the 5pm departure is set in stone. Half hour coffee breaks morning and
afternoon, 90 minute lunch breaks and they still manage to be out by 5! If I
hear one more wisecrack about not being able to get out of bed and my late
arrivals I will personally chain them to my bench and point out to them the
time I spend in the break room and the time at which I down tools and leave.
And would the person who stole my mug from the cupboard please return it
before I need my next caffeine fix at about 3pm - (not even the layer upon
layer of tea stains has put them off taking it).

Weekends were made for this

We've spent the whole weekend doing what we want to do and I really feel like I'm starting to relax. We headed towards Newcastle and spent the day on the Quayside, taking in the bridges, the Baltic, the Sage, a good lunch and a stroll along the banks of the Tyne. We're easy pleased! Although the 'contemporary art' in the Baltic was a bit weird and we didn't go past the first floor. An old record or a piece of graph paper with some of the squares shaded in isn't really my idea of good art.

We did have a frustrating morning though. This was the third time we had tried to view the same house, the first time the owner turned us away saying he had told the estate agent to cancel and last time there was nobody in when we went. We were really looking forward to seeing it again (we saw it a few months ago but thought it was too much of a mess) but yet again there was nobody there. We think this is another case of people not really wanting to sell despite their house being on the market. After the wife has been dropped in with viewings on our place recently we are starting to get sick of the whole house business. I think we started looking too early, before we were able to do anything about moving. Hopefully, we can get another viewing with the agent rather than the vendor because we think this is the house for us!

Tonight though I'm all calm and relaxed after our day in the sunshine. Time for a soak in the bath and curl up with the wife in front of the TV.

Dr Holly

The fools fell for it and have award me the PhD. The viva wasn't nearly as bad as I expected and I was pleased with some of the feedback I got, although I didn't perform quite as well as I would have liked to. The relief is enormous and not just for me but for everyone around me as well I expect. There are certain people that I couldn't have done it without, the wife in particular has got me through the last four years and if it wasn't for her I don't think I would have finished it (although se got me into that mess in the first place!). And what better excuse to open the bottle of very nice champagne that's been sitting on the shelf for the last two years!

Delightful distractions

Locked away at home revising I over-heard the wife playing computer games with 5 year old:

Wife: "I'll only play if you stop picking your nose... [Pause]... your turn... [Pause]... What have you done with your snots?"

And that's why I tend not to use the wifes computer!

Time up

My viva is nearly here thank God! I've had enough sleepless nights and stomach chunring to last me now thank you very much. People keep telling me, and I think I know they're right, that it is just formality and I couldn't get this far and not pass but there is a little niggle that keeps me thinking I could be the first person in the department to fail outright! The closer it gets the more convinced I am that I know nothing about my subject. By tomorrow I'll know nothing but am aiming to know it all - I'd better crack on then!

It doesn't help that I've re-discovered one of my old childhood favourites - Lemmings

Who's the daddy

Discussing the subject of my last post with my mother she set off on one along the lines of "that generation have payed for the NHS all their lives and are now being denied the treatment they deserve" which of course I aggree with but she followed it up with "instead the money is being spent on sex change operations and fertility treatment for same sex couples!"

I guess I'll not get impregnated by the NHS then.

Alzheimer's

NICE (National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence) were supposed to publish their guidelines for the treatment of Alzheimer's disease but have delayed this and have instaed put out their draft guidelines. I suppose this means that there is still some hope. I mentioned this briefly back in March but have a lot more to say on this matter now.

NICE are suggesting that the only effective drugs used in the treatment of Alzheimer's be used only once patients have progressed to the moderate/severe stages of the disease. That is, once the disease has progressed far enough to affect daily life for patients and their carers, often to the extent where the patient has to leave their home for long term care. Is it really fair to wait until a disease has become this severe before starting treatment?

Alzheimer's does not just manifest as memory loss. Depression, aggression, delusions and hallucinaitons are other common symptoms on top of the cognitve decline. (Indeed, the guidelines suggest that the one drug which in severe Alzheimers is effective against these distressing, behavioural symptoms be withdrawn altogether). The disease doesn't just affect the patient, carers are as affected by Alzheimers and are often elderly spouses who find the physical demands as hard as the emotional strain. There is no cure but current treatments slow the progression of this disease, allowing people affected by Alzheimer's to maintain a better quality of life for longer. While these draft guidelines are better than the complete ban on the use of these drugs that was suggested last year, not all of the factors have been taken into consideration and the new suggestions are still far from ideal.

For more information on dementia or the NICE guidelines visit the Alzheimer's Society. They can also offer help and support if you or someone you know is affectd by dementia. (Or the Alzheimer's Association in the US - but the NICE business is irrelevent so you US readers probably won't have got this far)!

Appreciation

How wonderful is the wife? She has been in the kitchen for hours preparing sunday dinner - roast beef with all the trimmings - allowing me to get on with revision for my viva. The house is full of wonderful smells! She has this canny knack of knowing how and when to make my life easy.

Milk and sugar?

Last week we had the news that boobs can bounce up to 135m as a woman runs a mile. This week the men in white coats have come up with the idea that coffee consumption can boost a womans sex drive. (Is there a theme developing here? But hey, Women, science and coffee - what better combination). I want to do this sort of research, or in the case of the coffee, I'll volunteer as a human subject! It's reassuring to know that grant money is being spent on life-changing research. Coffee anyone?

Ziggy

This is one of the best news stories I've read in a while.

"Somewhere in Yorkshire, there lurks a proverbially nauseous parrot. Ziggy, an eight-year-old African Grey, had provided Chris Taylor with years of companionship until the fateful day when he opened his beak to mimic his owner's girlfriend and squawked out one word: Gary.
Ziggy's obsession with his latest impression grew and he began uttering "Hi Gary!" every time Suzy Collins' mobile phone rang. Chris's suspicions deepened after Ziggy started to make long kissing noises whenever he heard the name Gary on television or the radio.
Things between Chris and Suzy finally came to a head the night Ziggy decided to blurt out: "I love you, Gary" in her voice. When Chris confronted Suzy about his pet's obsession, she admitted to having had a four-month affair with Gary, a former colleague".

A know-it-all

My school reports always used to say 'Holly needs to ask if there is something that she doesn't understand'. I used to hate having to put up my hand in class for fear of looking like an idiot, I always felt that I should know it and shouldn't need to ask. Now I'm feeling like I'm in the same situation. As a post-doc I'm working on a similar sort of project to my post-grad project but there are some big differences. I don't know at what point I should be putting up my hand and saying 'I don't understand' or 'am I doing this right'. I'm teaching myself but then I worry that I'm wasting time on stuff that I should know. I'm not supposed to know it all and I'm not trying to pretend that I do - I just still haven't learnt when to ask for help.

Summer time

It's a beautiful, spring like day here in the North East. When I got up this morning I opened the windows and was pleasently surprised that I didn't freeze or get blown away and could hear the birds singing. (I was almost inspired to write poetry, but I can't and I was more interested in getting rid of the smell of the delicious if rather strong curry the wife cooked last night before a couple came to look at the house). Even now, I'm sitting in my office with the window wide open. Is winter now behind us or am I tempting fate? Will I wake tomorrow morning to find us snowed in? Is it wrong that we will get colder due to global warming and we are actually getting warmer? Or does everything just seem sunnier after a good nights sleep?

Following a trend

I'm revising for my PhD viva which is in X days (I'm not saying how many for the simple reason that it will scare the shit out of me). The wife is being very supportive and trying to make me feel less anxious by reminding me that the examiners won't actually have read the whole thing. In which case, why did I do it? Why oh why did I spend four years worth of blood, sweat and tears producing a 250 page document that no one will ever read properly? And why oh why when I was proof reading before submission did I not spot the glaringly obvious mistake of putting one number in table 1 and a completely different number in my discussion of table 1?* Perhaps I was unknowingly, being fashionable before it was fashionable to make up results like Dr Hwang and his fake cloning and Dr Sudbo and his imaginary cohort of patients with oral cancer. Disgrace me now, save me from the trauma of the interrogation viva and let me go and get a proper job. (Like creating fluorescent pigs - I was about to lay into Ms Kennedy over this portrayal of scientists but then realised that she is actually fairly accurate in her description: "Scientists are, by their very definition, nerds with curious senses of humour and no sex skills")!

*Please note that I would never knowingly fabricate data, I am however very good at typographical errors

The saga continues

We are still looking for a house, I know, it has been going on for months! This week we have been messed around three times. We want to go back and see a house we have seen before but discounted because we would have ended up knocking down walls and building new ones. Now we have decided that this wouldn't be so bad if it would give us the space we need. The first night we knocked on the door and the bloke answered in his dressing gown and said he had told the agents to cancel so we rearranged for yesterday. When we tried again yesterday there was no answer. Friday someone was supposed to come and see our house and despite claiming to have knocked on the door, failed to turn up.

We daren't go for the house we really want because the woman doesn't want to move but is being forced out by her ex so she is being difficult about viewings, putting holes in walls, ripping tiles off bathrooms... We don't trust her not to leave the house which would leave us stuck if our place sells. Another house has come onto the market - perfect location, ideal size, fantastic garden - but it's a complete modernisation job. I think this would be good fun (and a chance to build up a collection of power tools)! Perhaps we have been to fussy in the past and are now getting desperate!

More science

There is an article today which provides further evidence that exercise is unhealthy and makes me think that I'm in the wrong field, this is the kind of research I want to do!

Mad, bad and dangerous to know?

I am supposed to be training on a newly installed peice of kit this week but it has broken down already. Just as I was starting to get the hang of it and getting all excited about running proper samples, it starting throwing up all sorts of error messages. By the time it is fixed I will probably have forgotten even how to turn the thing on let alone do any analysis. Fortunately the technical support is pretty good so we should be up and running again soon. I have taken the opportunity to work from home on catching up with blog reading/writing report writing, grant applications and revising my Phd for my viva in a couple of weeks.

On the subject of grant applications, I've just started this project and we are already putting in new applications. Unfortunately I think this is going to be the story of my life, unless I make the break into industry. This isn't a move I'm keen on, I want my work to be useful in ways other than to line the pockets of the share holders but at the same time all the bureaucracy in academia is already getting in the way of me just getting on with research. This article sums it up nicely, and I guess it's that 'eureka' moment that keeps me going. As for whether I look like a mad scientist should do - perhaps I do a little bit first thing in the morning but for you own sake I shall leave it to your imagination!

New Addition

Happy news - another grandkid has joined the family and the girls now out number the boys! The photos are gorgeous and I can't wait to meet her. The only trouble is that she will set my biological clock ticking! Surprisingly the wife is quite keen for me to have kids and we often talked about how one of her sons would be the ideal donor/father. We'll just have to wait and see if any of them still want to 'sow their oats' when the time comes! Perhaps I should just stick to grandkids. The oldest (6 yr old) has been here tonight. Her giggle is so infectious that we were both aching from laughing and I still couldn't tell you what we found so amusing! What better therapy can there be.

Insomnia

I've spent the last half hour writing a post which started off about Big Brother and turned into something quite philosophical. However I'm struggling to get my ideas down coherently so will sleep on it and finish it off in the morning. I'm knackered as the wife couldn't sleep last night which as it turned out was quite entertaining (although not for the reasons you might be thinking)! As I was trying to sleep we had the following exchange;

Wife: 'Are you tired?'
Me: 'Uh huh'
Wife: 'You're always bloody tired you are'!
Me: 'Well it is half past three in the bloody morning'!

Fortunately this amused us both, but I didn't dare tell her I was knackered this afternoon!

Resolutely resolved

I have spent the last few days thinking about new years resolutions. Things
like improve my fitness, eat more healthily, drink less, be better at
keeping in touch with people, procrastinate less and work more... you've
heard them all before I'm sure. But if it has taken me until the 4th and I
still haven't decided then it is a waste of time, since I should have broken
my new years resolution by yesterday. So don't be looking at me to change.

(Perhaps I should resolve to find more interesting topics to blog about)

Have a Happy One

Happy New Year to you!

I finally made it home in time for New Year. I was all prepared to battle my
way through the weather to get here but saw very little evidence of the
several feet of snow the TV had been prattling on about. New Years eve was a
quiet one. I find it is over rated and I'm not one for spending half an hour
at the bar trying to get a drink while being jostled from all sides and
having perfect stranges jump on you at midnight, so we stayed at home and
watched the festivities on the TV (where the bottle of bubbly was accessible
without having to leave the sofa). There was a little excitement at midnight
when the wife got a phone call to say her sons wife had gone into labour and
that yet another grandkid was on the way but it turned out to be a false
alarm.

New Years day was our Christmas day so after exchanging presents and a big
breakfast we went for a walk on the beach. Although it was drizzly and the
wind was chilly, the tide was in and the waves were crashing over the sea
wall and it was just the perfect way to blow away the past year ready to
start again. Of course then we had to have a go on the slot machines in the
amusement arcade to dry off - (I was three quid up at one point but
eventually lost twice that) - Vegas it ain't but it was fun! We had bought
each other daft gifts this year so spent the rest of the day playing table
football, magnetic darts and monopoly, before collapsing in an exhaused heap
in front of 'Under the Tuscan Sun'. If you haven't seen it and want a nice,
feel good film, its well worth a watch (and Tuscany looks gorgeous which has
set the wife off thinking about moving somewhere warm and sunny and
Tuscany-like)!

But now it is like the holidays never happened and life is back to normal,
it's my first day back at work and i'm full of enthusiasm (hence I have time
to write all this rubbish)! So wherever you are, whoever you are and
whatever you do, I hope 2006 is a good year!

Hands

Hand
by Carol Ann Duffy

Away from you, I hold hands with the air,
your imagined, untouchable hand. Not there,
your fingers braid with mine as I walk.
Far away in my heart you start to talk.

I squeeze the air, kicking the auburn leaves,
everything suddenly gold. I half believe
your hand is holding mine. The way it would
if you were here. what do you say

in my heart? I bend my head to listen, then feel
your hand reach out and stroke my hair, as real
as the wind caressing the fretful trees above.
Now I can hear you clearly, speaking of love.


From Rapture, Carol Ann Duffy (2005)



I stopped and thought about my last post after I had written it and realised that I have a lot more choice in how I spend the holidays than many people do. We choose to spend christmas where we do, if only for a quiet life for the other 364 days of the year. So this is firstly for the wife and secondly for who ever you want it to be for.

Discontent

I was planning on travelling home tomorrow but all I keep hearing about is heavy snow and disruption. The met office are saying an 80% risk of disruption up the eastern side of the country - half the length of which I want to trundle up tomorrow in my little tin can. As it is, although there's no snow here I can't get into my car because of frozen locks (problem there being that the gin is in the boot, an extra 24 hours here and I'm going to need that gin)! I don't like driving in the snow as I tend to get transfixed on the falling snow hitting the windscreen and forget that I'm hurtling along at speed. My other problem is that I'm succeeding in losing weight at a time when most people are putting it on. The wife and I love our food. Before we even make it out of bed, three meals are planned for the day ahead. My mum has one meal a day and so there are none of the lovely morning/lunch/afternoon snacks that I am used to. No bacon and egg, sausage sarnies or three course lunches. There's not even a mince pie in the house! There is a small box of Celebrations but my small cousins ate all the best ones the other day (on the up side I have just spotted Celebrations Mahjongg, if only dial-up wasn't so slow, it might take my mind of the hungar). Of course food isn't the only reason I miss home, there's the dog as well. (Oh, and the wife's sense of humour) And her.....

...well, just her!

Mistletoe and Wine

All of a sudden Christmas appeared. I suppose it's because I didn't have much preparation to do. I travelled to my mums last Friday and things have been a little bit strange here. I still haven't spoken to my dad since he left and I thought he might try to phone me this week. So far he hasn't but I did get a card! Mum is finding this week hard but fortunately Christmas day we went to friends, otherwise it might have been depressing just us at home. As it was we had a good time, although I think I may have been mostly responsible the empty bottle of brandy!

The wife is still at home with her family. Of course I miss her whenever I'm away but this time I'm particularly feeling it. (I don't want to think about how big my phone bill will be, but she has such a gorgeous phone voice)! I think it's because she is great to talk to when I get fed up of the situation with my parents, or any situation for that matter. And also because if it was just us two at Christmas we would make it a special time, more so than it is for either of us as things are. Hey-ho, just three more sleeps until I go home and my little cousins are coming tomorrow so that will keep me busy for the day.

I hope you had a great time this Christmas and that it was everything you wanted it to be.

Away in a manger

This morning I got to go to the oldest grandkids carol service. I was preparing a rant about how her school weren't doing a nativity play and how the true meaning of Christmas has been lost but the school have redeemed themselves. Although I suppose nativity plays must be a chore for teachers and parents alike - apart from the one line your little darling gets to say the rest is irrelevant. I always ended up being an angel, with itchy tinsel wrapped around my head. Apart from the year I was a cloud (a sign that class sizes were on the increase and there weren't enough parts to go round?). I always wanted to be a shepherd, I wanted to sit around in my dressing gown with a tea-stained t-towel on my head! Anyway, the carol service was lovely (apart from the happy-clappy woman who spent too long trying to convince 4 and 5 year olds that when they look at their christmas tree they should remember Jesus dying on the cross and some other miracle that even I, as a good catholic girl, couldn't understand). The little'un was pleased we were there though.

Afterwards we went Christmas shopping - i.e. a two hour lunch and half an hour in the shops before deciding we'd had enough!

Dirty stop out

A friend came for dinner last night and drank us dry. She didn't leave until 3am and then only because the wife actually fell asleep! The trouble is, no matter what time I go to bed I still wake up at the same time so today has been a write-off, I have hardly left the sofa. Is 7.30pm to early to go to bed?

Our Story: Part 2

I just rattled off the first part without really stopping but this I have thought about a bit more. The first part probably reads like your typical girl-meets-girl kind of tale but here are the bits I missed out.

On the internet, when we were having fun in a chat room, age was irrelevant but it eventually came out that the wife is twice my age. Me being a young 20-something had no history, no baggage, but she had been married and had kids who are my age. This wasn’t a problem online and neither of us expected the relationship to continue in the real world. We expected to go home from our first meeting as good friends, nothing more. We have discussed the age gap so often, less so now than in the early days, and decided that when we are left alone to get on with our lives it is not an issue.

Obviously, the situation is complicated by her kids. We have decided that it is simpler to keep our relationship to ourselves and the age gap makes this easier – well who would think that their mother was having an affair with a woman more than half her age? The situation was ideal. The wife was living alone and I needed a place to live, the rent I pay her comes in handy and it’s cheaper for me than renting elsewhere. Plus we get on so well. The added bonus for me is the grandkids. The oldest was only one when I moved in and more have arrived since and I have been able enjoy them growing up. All the advantages of being a grandparent with none of the responsibilities.

There are times that the age gap is felt – I am just setting out on my career while the wife is thinking towards retirement; her life is full of grandchildren while I would love to have children of my own one day; But when it’s just us, life couldn’t be much better. Frequently I wonder who is older, especially when she is up half the night while I am in bed by 10.30 or when I’m telling her to quieten down before the neighbours start to complain!

I can’t imagine what my life would be like now if we had done the ‘sensible thing’ and just stuck to being friends. The wife has always been there for me over the last five years and will, God willing, be there for many years to come. I know many people wouldn’t approve and indeed when an old friend of mine came to visit recently it seemed she couldn’t see past the age gap, although fortunately she is the exception. Hopefully, by telling our story in two parts, you will see that we are just a regular couple living our regular life and the little things aren't important.

Mouth watering

Earlier this evening the wife was watching TV in which Hugh Fernley Whittingstall was killing a turkey for Christmas dinner. This seemed to upset her somewhat, to the extent that she declared "if I didn't enjoy eating meat so much I would be a vegetarian". I missed the programme as I was cooking a turkey curry. Yes, she did eat it and yes, she did enjoy it!

Up the creek

I have been sent home from work after nearly two weeks as the funds out of which my wages are paid haven't come through yet. It's good to have a nice long Christmas holiday but not so good as I was expecting to be paid at the end of this month and have been bashing the credit card a bit recently. It would also seem that I have worked several days for nothing, although I wasn't that busy and spent quite a bit of time practicing solitaire. And I got most of the background reading to the project done so that when I start again next month it will be a nice easy start. If anyone would like to make a donation my email address is at the side (shy kids get nowt)!

At least I've got plenty of time to finish 'our story' and have a play around with the template, see if I can't brighten this place up a bit.

And for free entertainment I'm getting into Mahjong and to replace Sudoku there is Kakuro.

Our story

This is the story of how the wife and I met, just over five years ago and the first year we were together. It's a long one so I hope you're sitting comfortably.

We met online back in December 2000 when I was living with my parents and the wife was living 200 miles further north. I think we were both looking for a bit of fun which is exactly how it started out although the only thing I remember about that night is her words, she is a poet at heart. The following few nights we found each other again in the same chat room and the rest as they say is history. We first spoke on the phone an hour into 2001 and this is how the relationship was conducted over the next few weeks.

Inevitably we had to meet and so it was with a churning in my stomach I set out one morning in March only to be back home an hour later as the 5 millimetres of snow had stopped the buses running and inevitably, the trains wouldn’t be far behind them. The wife thought this was just an excuse but I proved her wrong when we finally made it to York on the 19th April 2001. I will never forget those first few minutes in York station and the following taxi ride to the minster (it was raining and there was no way the wife was going to get her hair wet - something I was to get used to)! I was so nervous that all I could say for the first 10 minutes was yes or no and all my efforts were concentrated into stopping my knees from knocking together, (successfully as she never noticed me shaking). We walked around the Minster and few of the shops before finding somewhere to eat. I sat there with visions of me spilling gravy down my top and dropping peas everywhere but the meal passed without incident, apart from the wife stopping me mid-sentence to mutter something behind her hand. I didn't hear what it was she said but could tell from the look on her face that she felt the same way I did.

Later that afternoon we found ourselves in a cosy pub (something we have become good at) and talked for hours. It was only after admiring her watch that we noticed the time and that we had both missed our trains home. Deciding that there was nothing we could do about it we had another drink then made our way to the station. The departure board showed no trains going in my direction and the wife was adamant that she couldn't leave me behind not knowing if I would be stuck there, so would I go home with her. I protested a couple of times (along the lines of "no I couldn't, there will be a train along in a minute, no really, oh, okay then, why not"). By the time we had bought the ticket there was indeed a train going my way but by then it was too late. On the way home she kept telling me that she would sleep on the sofa, trying to convince me that the invitation was more about my saftey than wanting to get me into bed. I must have been convinced as York to Manchester in the rush hour is not short of trains!

On the walk from the station to her home we stopped off in another cosy pub (see, it’s a habit) and found a quiet nook where we talked some more, and some more. Eventually we made it home and, I'll not go into detail, but wine, music and a comfy sofa... We did both sleep in her bed (being all shy I borrowed a nighty of hers but she is smaller than me, how anything happened that night with me wearing that I'll never know, I could barely move in it. But happen it did). This was the first time either of us had slept with another woman (I'm a slow starter and God only knows what her excuse is)!

The following day we danced to Van Morrison as we waited for the taxi to take me to the station. I returned home and started planning our next meeting. She came to stay with me for a couple of days by which time I was applying for jobs at her end of the country and after a few weeks I had a couple of interviews. In the July we hired a cottage in the Lake District and spent a magical week getting to know each other, no one has ever made me laugh as much as she did that week (things like sex in the jacuzzi being interrupted by worries of the bubbles ruining the carpet and not being able to find car parks so continuing through three towns until we reached the sea and couldn't drive any further).

In between visits it was frustrating having to go back to conducting our relationship over the phone and internet, that is where the title of this blog came from, we were contentedly discontent. August we spent apart but then more interviews came up in September, one which allowed us to spend a couple of days in Northumberland where we rented an apartment for a couple of days (I would like to appologise to the owner for the dents left in the carpet where we pushed to two single beds together, we were young and in love)! Then out of the blue, I was offered a job and three weeks later I moved in with the wife for good. It was then that I realised that I couldn't remember her asking me to move in, had I just taken in upon myself to turn up with my suitcase and boxes of junk? The wife can't remember either but she didn't seem to mind.

So that's it. But when real life takes over it's not quite that simple.

To be continued…

Disclaimer

We were talking last night about blogging and the wife pointed out that the
title of this blog is a phrase of hers (uttered frequently when we were
living hundreds of miles apart). So I agreed to a disclaimer along the lines
of "The title 'Contentedly Discontent' remains the property of the wife and
is not my original work" - which, as she pointed out, is profoundly
unprofound!

Popping the question

Am I still allowed to call the wife 'the wife' since the civil partnership act came into being last week? I did point out to the wife that we could now marry (sorry, it's not called marriage, she could become my civil partner), and she asked 'would you really want to?' I didn't pursue the matter any further!

I shall simply treasure the ring she bought me in our first year (and one day tell you our story and why, for my own safety, she won't 'marry' me)!

Food for thought

There is something disappointing about having a meal and not enjoying it. The wife and I love our food but this can sometimes become a problem. Today we had a break from the Sunday roast and got loads of stuff to go in a stir-fry. Lovely, until we opened a jar of sauce which kind of spoilt it. I hate spending time preparing lovely ingredients only to not enjoy the finished meal, I feel cheated and totally not satisfied!

To cheer things up a bit we have put up some decorations, although I'm still not feeling the christmas cheer. I am however finding it amusing when things keep falling down making the wife jump up to stick them back up again - it won't go on for much longer, super-strength sticky tape will be used once the novelty wears off! I'll be less amused if it pulls the paint of the recently painted walls. And candlelight is very romantic (but I hope the wax doesn't go go all over the new mantlepiece) Never mind, come boxing day I'll have changed my mind and be full of the spirit of the season! Now where did I put those chocolate tree decorations...?

The wheels on the bus

I have to confess to being a bit of a bus spotter (I can spot a Vanhool from a Scania at 100 meters) so I was sad to read about the end of the Routemaster on the streets of London. When I lived down there I much preferred to take the bus than the Tube and often used to take a route that used the old Routemasters rather than the modern pay-the-grumpy-driver buses. There was something special about crossing Westminster bridge and passing Big Ben on the number 12, although on a number of occasions I jumped off the back and crashed straight into a lampost! The reasons for getting rid (maintenance cost, health and safety etc.) are out numbered by the reasons why they should be kept, in my opinion. Of course their case isn't helped by the fact that they need two staff, driver and conductor (conductors being more friendly and helpful than drivers make this a plus if you ask me) I expect the accountants can't wait for the day when London transport can be controlled remotely from a call center in India! It's like trying to get rid of the yellow taxis in New York (not that I have ever been to New York, but I did experience a scary yellow taxi ride in Philadelphia last year), anyway, I expect it wouldn't be allowed. Perhaps to console myself I'll go and build a paper bus (and start thinking about something sensible to blog about)!

Televisual delights!

I was going to blog about how Sarah Beeny , Davina McCall and chocolate muffins all in one program make for a televisual delight. But then I would have to tell you that how I convinced the wife that even if Sarah Beeny and Davina McCall arrived together to feed me chocolate muffins I would turn them away. I pointed out it is 5 years tomorrow since we met. "Is it really, the 10th tomorrow" was her reply. "No, the 9th" said I, not surprised. "The 9th tomorrow?" asked she, "yes, the 9th of December, 5 years, tomorrow" said I. The wife's typically lovely reply was "Well, as the dwarf said to Snow White, it's not the length that matters, it's how good it is"! How could anyone compete with that?

And how are you today?

A note to all customer service operatives: when you phone me to try and get
my to spend my money on something I don't really want or need, asking me if
you can call me by my first name and then asking how I am today will not
make me any more likely to part with my money. Phoning just as I am sitting
down to eat will also not make me any more likely to listen to your whole
speech before I interrupt to tell you that I'm not interested thank you
anyway. I have nothing against you personally, I know you are only doing a
job, but I have to get this rant off my chest. Next time you phone me dear
credit card company and ask how I am today, you might just find out the
f*****g truth!

P.S. I have nothing against customer service people (the wife was one
herself for a time) I merely object to the companies that employ them to bug
me!

Thank you for your time today.

Bah Humbug

Is it just me or is anyone else sick of Christmas already? Every year the madness starts earlier - the traffic last night was chaos and unfortunately my journey takes me in the general area of the Metro Centre, a nightmare of a place at the best of times but full of Christmas shoppers it is hell on earth. Try finding a parking space anywhere near the city centre and you can kiss goodbye to getting to a meeting on time (how to make a good impression in your first week)! Three of the houses opposite our bedroom window are already illuminated and flashing incessantly and it is only a matter of time before the inflatable santa is trying to float down from the roof of a house around the corner. Fortunately I can come out of hiding at work as the christmas meal is booked and paid for and I have managed to avoid adding my name to the list (not the meal for which we were asked to sign up for in June - I deleted that email without even reading past the subject line). It's not that I don't want to go, I just can't afford it having not been paid since January. That and the 'secret santa'. I still haven't worked out who the person I had to buy for last year is and obviously who ever bought for me doesn't know me from Adam as I am still deciding if it is a table cloth or a shawl!

Perhaps my lack of enthusiasm for christmas is down to the fact that I'm not looking forward to the event itself in any way, shape or form after my Dads recent departure from the family. Christmas day was the only day in recent years when my parents, my brother and myself were all in the same place at the same time. Also, due to our respective family commitments the wife and I have to spend Christmas apart. Perhaps it is also due to the lack of small children in my family (for which my mother will only blame myself)! Christmas doesn't seem to have the same magic as it does when there a kids involved. Which reminds me that Christmas isn't all bad as I'm sure the kids on the wife's side of the family will be only to happy to help decorate the house and make mince pies!

So when is the last posting date for Christmas? No, not for posting cards but for ordering on the internet, you don't think I'm going near a shop do you!

The future's bright

When I first started my phd project many moons ago it was all so new and
exciting and I set out with the idea that I was going to change the world
(or at least come up with something useful to lessen the suffering of
generations to come). In reality this didn't happen (although someone
somewhere might find my work interesting one day, if only to stop them going
through the endless repetition of experiments that I went through). The
problem I now have is that, as much as I try to ignore it, that same feeling
of setting out to change the world keeps popping into my head. I can't help
wondering if every time I start a new project I'm going to have the same
ideas only to spend the next 3 years banging my head against a brick wall
and begging for funding to try something else (but I shall save the joys of
funding and contracts in the hallowed halls of academia for another post).
For now though I can't help feeling just a little bit excited!

Physical and mental anguish!

We were going to go away for a romantic weekend together this weekend but took one look at the weather forecast and decided to have a romantic weekend at home. The wife has a cold so hit the whiskey last night (for medicinal purposes of course) and it turned into one of those up half the night talking sessions. However judging by the muscles that are aching today it was the other half of the night that we enjoyed even more. Perhaps I'm not as fit as I thought I was!

Tomorrow I officially start my new job. The advantage over most new jobs is that I am still working in the same place as I have been for the last four years. As this means that I don't have to go through all the stress associated with being a newbie I can focus all my anxieties onto the fact that I should now know what I'm talking about. There is no longer the excuse of "I'm only a student so you can't expect me to know that yet" but I'm still not quite sure of what's expected of me as a post-doc. I'm sure it's only a matter of time before people work out that I don't really have a clue!

Love is blind (just not to damp walls)

Friday night is property night in the local paper and the wife is scouring the pages, the frustration starting to show. There has been some interest in the wifes house and one couple apparently said they had to speak to the bank first but they want to put in an offer but then the next day they said they were going to see somewhere else before deciding (I know they are only trying to get the best price but they are offending my wife)! We, in the mean time, have changed our minds on the house we have the offer on. It's still gorgeous (or will be once we have finished with it) but it is a bit out of the way and kind of small compared to what we could get for the money. I know, I know, we are a bit indecisive, but hey, we like to be difficult. In the mean time the wife is getting frustrated and my attempts at making her feel better demonstrate just how romantic she is. I bent down to kiss her and said "I don't care where we end up as long as we are together, a cardboard box would do" to which her reply was "not tonight it wouldn't, it's feckin freezing"!

Happy families

I'm back, life is returning to normal. I spent a few days visiting my mum
and couldn't be doing with the time it took to do anything using her steam
powered pc with a super-slow dial-up. The reason I was visiting her is
because my dad has decided to trade her in for a younger model. I'm not
going to start throwing insults around here but suffice to say he is not my
most favourite person at the moment. I have had to come home and can't help
worrying about mum. Occasionally I feel sorry for him as well but then
remember the way he is treating his family. The anger is starting to fade
but I'm not sure I'll ever be able to forgive his recent behavour.

Where am I?

The footie was terrible at the weekend - both teams played badly but my old team won. At the end the wife got into a heated argument (i.e. nearly a full on fight) with another woman who told her that she should shut up and not bother coming back. The wife is a very passionate supporter and as well as getting behind the team towards the end she was also telling them just how bad they were (which the commentator on the match highlights that night also pointed out). This other woman obviously thought that this isn't on and took her frustration out on my other half. We seemed to be seated among a group of regulars, forming a little clique and the presence of us strangers didn't go down to well. Being made to feel uncomfortable amongst your fellow supporters is enough to put you off going, especially at the price of the tickets. My day just got better on returning home and news of a family crisis reached me, hence my absence from here over the last few days. But that's a story for another day.

Bad loser?

When I was growing up I was a fan of our local premiership football team and dad often took us to the games on a Saturday afternoon. Since moving in with the wife my allegiances have shifted to her team. This afternoon the two teams are playing each other and we have tickets. My problem is who to support? I'm thinking I'll decide at half time based on the first half performance. Or sooner depending on the size of the Black Cat fans surrounding me. Last time they played up here we also went and my old team lost, much to the delight of the wife and her family!

A tale of two houses

We had to go into town this morning so I popped into the estate agents selling the house we have the offer on, just to see if they had a detail sheet for it yet (they don't and we're hoping as we offered so quickly they won't bother). As I was browsing for our little would-be palace I overheard a phone call to a Mrs Banks, the same name as the people we are hoping to buy from, at which my ears pricked. The agent said he had had another offer of £160K but still had to sell their home and was this similar to the other offer they had. If it is the same Mrs Banks then it is similar but slightly higher than our offer, which they were happy to accept. If it is the same Mrs Banks then both us and the other people wanting our would-be palace have to sell houses before being able to proceed. What are the chances of there being two Mrs Banks selling a house in the same price range with the same estate agents?


UPDATE at 15.45: The couple who viewed here the other night want to come back later this week for a second look in the daylight. The problem I have with this is that for the next 72 hours the wife will be cleaning, tidying and generally getting stressed while I keep track of how many times I get told off for leaving my shoes/cup/body lying around! Bless her!

Some people!

The new job I’m waiting to start is pretty much just an extension of my old job (only new title and more money – progressing from post-grad to post-doc) so I am occasionally popping into work to make sure that no one steals my pipettes or tidies my desk (a necessity since someone put my lab coat in for the laundry, never to be seen again – those stains represented hundreds of hours of hard labour and if it was smelly it was to keep people who would otherwise distract me away). Anyway, today I just happened to be in time for a departmental meeting, unfortunately. Firstly, it was chaired by a little man suffering from little man syndrome, full of his own importance and talking down to us all. Secondly, why is that whenever a meeting could be over with relatively quickly there is always someone who wants to discuss all the fine details that affect them personally yet affect no one else? It was just before lunch time and whenever she stopped to take a breath you could hear the bellies rumbling, mine included. I'll have to try and avoid the next meeting, trouble is I can't remember when it is!

Remembering

I was watching the remembrance day parades this morning and, among other thoughts, wishing I knew more about the history of the early 20th century and the two world wars in particular. I dropped history at school as soon as I could as I just couldn't see the point of it. All we seemed to do was how castles why castles were built on a hill surrounded by a moat and I think the wives of Henry 8th must have been taught because I can remember 'divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived', just don't ask me to name them. Perhaps all of this did shape the Great Britain we live in today but more modern history might have been more relevant to life today.

Adjusting

I'm starting to get used to having nothing to do. I'm getting to grips with day time TV schedules, my only complaint being that 15 to 1 isn't on anymore and Countdown just isn't the same without Richard Whiteley. The new 'Deal or no Deal' is completely addictive. The first time I saw it I thought it was the most boring, pointless 45 minutes of TV I'd seen in at least a week but the following day I found myself glued to the screen and now heaven forbid anyone interrupt me between 4.15 and 5pm. Then there's weakest Link followed by Eggheads and all of a sudden the day is over. I am debating whether when I start work again I should start early so that I can be home in time for all of this. Countdown starts at 3.30 so I would have to leave work at 3.00 at the latest which would mean starting at 7am. Okay, maybe not, especially as I used to struggle to get there for 10! Perhaps my priorities will have to change again.

Bodies

At last, I have dug out the credit card and purchased a router so I can now get on the world wide interweb anytime, any place, so expect more irrelevant ramblings and details of semi-significant moments in my life. Not now however since Bodies is starting and there is nothing better than a bit of blood and gore interspersed with bare breasts on a Saturday night.

Holidays

As I have finished writing up I am now on holiday for the next three weeks. So, this afternoon I went to the seaside! Actually we walked for hours. The wife took me around a park I've never seen before and we had probably the longest conversation we have had in many weeks - mostly planning what we want to do with our new house. That which has been keeping the wife occupied over the summer is over and out of her hands and the Phd which has filled every other thought I've had for the last four years is complete. Today has been like the days we used to have when we first got together and that first summer we spent together, before life got in the way. The difference today is that I love her even more than I did then and I can't wait for us to move into our new home.

March

Not wanting to wish my life away but I can't wait for next March!
Juliet Turner is touring and will be in the north east. We travelled up to Glasgow to see her last year and have been waiting for another gig ever since. Her live album came out yesterday - go and buy it now! Go, now! Ahh that Irish accent...

I have a life (sort of)

I finished my Phd thesis last week and got it submitted - all I have to do now is wait for the viva - joy! I have spent all weekend feeling guilty thinking that I should be working, instead I have had a life! Two days running we have been out for lunch, last night we went with a small child to a firework display, complete with fairground rides and most of today has been spent with my nose in a book. This however was not the type of book I am used to - this was a piece of fiction! Actually it wasn't, it was Gladys Reunited by Sandi Toksvig - a v funny read, but more biographical than fiction, including lots of stuff about American history. Next something really trashy. But to finish the weekend, a bath and a bottle of wine for the pair of us - time to get our life back.

Thoughts on today

I have developed a bit of a habit of talking to myself as I work. Now this
is fine when I'm locked away at home with only the dog to disturb but back
at work I'm wondering how long it's going to be before I get told to "shut
the f*** up". I prefer working at home for other reasons as well. 1) free
coffee (I haven't paid any tea money recently and daren't risk pinching even
a tea bag) 2) I got out of bed at 8.30am and still didn't start work until
nearly 10.00 and 3) the reason for 2) was that it took me 20 minutes to find
somewhere to park and there is no guaruntee that when I return to my car it
will still have four wheels and all windows in tact. I wouldn't mind so much
if they would steal the whole car as the insurance would pay towards a nice
shiny new one, but the locals aren't clever enough to get it started!

Frustration

I have sat around at work all day doing nothing (because I have nothing to
do for a change, not because I can't be bothered to do what I should be
doing) waiting for an email so that I would have something to do. I have
been logged into my email all day and repeatedly pressed the 'check mail'
button. So how many emails that I was waiting for do you think arrived?
That's right, none. Zero. And how many other emails arrived to take my mind
of the email that hadn't arrived? That's right, none. Zero. Not even a reply
from the wife about nothing in particular. Not even offers of cut-price
medication to improve my sexual performance. And not even one, single offer
of a penis enlargement. Am I to take it that I am unpopular.